Dr Justin Coulson's Happy Families

A lot of families love to "roast" or tease one another as a means of good-natured camaraderie. When done well (in the right circumstances, the right tone, and for the right reasons), this kind of humour can increase connection. However, when done wrong, it can be disastrous, particularly when children are involved, as they may not understand nuance and sarcasm and tend to internalise this style of humour. Justin and Kylie discuss the role of humour within families, the importance of empathy, and an alternative to roasting and sarcasm that can lead to happier, healthier family relationships. In this episode: ChatGPT “roast my Insta feed” Humour - the good, the bad, the ugly The roast of Tom Brady Sarcasm, trash-talking, 'burning', baiting Verbal sparring, quick thinking, witty banter 3 benefits of "roasting" within a family Building resilience, connection, confidence 3 challenges and concerns of using this humour  Building a culture of disrespect The art of laughing at your own mistakes Empathy Related l

Would you let your 9-year-old ride the NY subway alone or your 15-year-old son travel abroad with friends? For doing just that, one mother received the label of "world's worst mum," and another was reported to social services! In today's risk-averse society, our children lack adventure. We want resilient children, and yet we try to control them in the name of safety, preventing them from being too adventurous. The problem is that if our kids don't do hard things, they don't get to be resilient.  Justin and Kylie share why playing it safe may just be the biggest risk of all! Kirstie Allsopp reported to social services for allowing son,15, to travel abroad | The Guardian Free range kids What if...? Resilience malaise I let my 9-year-old ride the subway alone. I got labeled the 'world's worst mum' | Lenore Skenazy | Washington Post Developmentally appropriate independence Finding purpose and direction through adventure and risk-taking The Least Interesting Generation | Brett McKay | The Art of Manliness Resil

An anonymous listener shares their frustration and exhaustion with a husband who feels more like an additional child than a partner, offering little support with household and family responsibilities. Justin unpacks "weaponised incompetence" and the unfairness and resentment that build when one parent is left carrying the load and provides guidance on how to address the issue in a way that avoids blame, accusations, and an all-out conflict. Michelle, from Victoria, has a daughter experiencing mental illness, with chronic insomnia, anxiety, and friendship issues—all leading to a feeling of exhaustion and desperation in the home. Justin shares some ideas with Michelle that will help her struggling daughter, emphasising the importance of finding what ignites delight in your child—and giving them more of it! In this episode: Weaponised incompetence When one parent feels overwhelmed, exhausted, resentful Be honest (without accusations or blame) Setting clear expectations and solutions NDIS Couples meeting Getting

In Australia, children below a certain age will be banned from social media as part of a national plan to counter its negative effects on youth. We discuss the government's commitments, the challenges this new legislation may face, and what parents can do now to protect their kids in a screen-saturated world. In this episode: 'National Social Media Age Limit' | A Current Affair Why 13+ is the current legal age Collecting personal data Politics and obstacles facing this legislation The impact of social media on kids Using screens well: with intentionality, self-regulation, limits Play-based childhood VS screen-based childhood Holding tech companies accountable What parents can do while waiting for legislation to pass Kids need smart parents not smartphones Building community Unplug Childhood - sign the pledge & join the village today!  The Screen Smart Series: 'Unplug Childhood' & 'Tweens, Teens & Screens' (included in membership) . Related links:  #980 The Anxious Generation With Jonathan Haidt

Justin shares his disappointment in unwittingly missing out on the opportunity to share meaningful, heartfelt words with the people he loves after choosing to clean the kitchen during an extended family get-together rather than participating in a family activity.  We all have a need to belong. You can help your child to have a sense of who they are and how they belong by creating family traditions and sharing family stories with them. Kylie shares how she included son-in-law Jared in one of their traditions by writing him into their family 'birth" story. In this episode: Missed opportunity Getting priorities right "If tomorrow never comes..." Ronan Keating Why vulnerability is hard! Using technology to check in with people we love Coulson daughter #2 has returned from Europe The need to belong Family traditions and stories Adoption Knowing family roots- -> increased resilience Teaching kids about positive relationships . Related links:  How well do you score in Prof. Duke's 'Do You Know' scale? Family T

A recent study has shown that parents who use humour have better relationships with their kids. But does all humour work in the same way? Are Dad jokes ok? Can sarcasm or roasting your child play a a positive role in parenting? And what are the consequences for our children when humour goes wrong?  In a large-scale Denmark study, data from 1.1 million people has shown associations between moving house in childhood and increased risk of depression later in life. We look at ways that parents can support their child during big transitions and soften the impact of the uprooting experience of moving house. In this episode: Humour in parenting: Does it have a role? | PLOS One Defining humour The consequences when humour goes wrong Funny = reciprocal/consensual The effects of house moves during early childhood on child mental health at age 9 years | Springer Link Bluey 'The Sign' Resilience Parental guilt regarding moving Association versus causation Smoothing transitions for your child Related links: #732 This i

Have you ever wondered if becoming a foster carer is something you could do? Our guest today, Belinda Baxter, has 13 children (6 biological, 7 foster) and joins us for an important conversation about foster care: what it looks like for her family, the challenges and the rewards, and what you can do to get the process started. This week, communities across Australia come together to celebrate Foster Care Week, an annual event dedicated to recognising the invaluable contributions of foster and kinship carers. In this episode: Foster Care Week Types of foster care (full-time, kinship, respite, emergency) Family dynamics Boundaries and foundations Independent living skills The process of becoming a carer Challenges and difficulties of caring for other people's children Related links: Fostering Connections (Victoria) DCJ Foster, relative and kinship care (NSW) Queensland Foster and Kinship Care Become a foster carer (SA) Become a foster carer (WA) Foster and Kinship Carers Association (NT) Foster care - Departm

This episode originally appeared as episode #1013. When we make feelings “King”, our children can become stuck in their emotion, unable to regulate or move forward. Justin shares the right way to respond to feelings, helping them understand, process, and then move through their emotional state.  In this episode: Revolutionary change in how parents respond to emotions Impact of TikTok parenting influencers Validating emotions Feeling seen, heard, valued Ways to regulate and tame emotions Parent or therapist? #822 The Emotional Lives of Teenagers - Part 1 #827 The Emotional Lives of Teenagers - Part 2 #976 Abigail Shrier's Bad Therapy How to help your child process their emotion and move on from it . Related links:  The Emotional Lives of Teenagers: Raising Connected, Capable, and Compassionate Adolescents, by Lisa Damour The Secret to Regulating Emotions Emotion Coaching [Webinar] Little People, Big Feelings [The Summit] . Find us on Facebook or TikTok Subscribe to the Happy Families newsletter Leave a voi

Dr Hannah Brown, Campaign Manager for Education and Young People for RU OK?, is working to decrease the stigma of mental health and to provide Australians with the skills and confidence to check in with one another EVERY day, and not just RU OK? day. Hannah shares advice for parents who may be dealing with a child who is not ok—how to have this conversation with them and support them through their struggles.  . In this episode: What to do when someone struggling says "I'm fine!" It's not our job to fix, but to notice, listen, and support Parent-to-child conversations Child-to-child conversations ALEC - Ask, Listen, Encourage Action, Check-in Teaching kids to be kind and respectful to their friends/classmates Building skills for strong and trusting relationships If you are not OK, please reach out for help: Kids Help Line 1800 55 1800 Parent Line (different number for each state) Lifeline 13 11 14 13YARN (for First Nations Australians) 13 92 76 Related links: #589 Mental Fitness With Gus Worla

'I'll Do Better Tomorrow' is a review of the week that was. With more work-related travel than ever before, Justin still managed to make it home for Father's Day—his best one yet with a peak "life moment" involving son-in-law Jared! Listen in to hear how their relationship has moved from reluctant acceptance to that of deep friendship because of a conscious decision to love unconditionally. Plus, some sobering facts from Lifeline's Annual Gala Ball: Over a million calls are made to Lifeline every single year. 3000 phone calls per day, which means that somebody is in crisis every 28 seconds! Thank you to all of Lifeline's volunteers, sponsors, workforce, and other contributors. We recognise the importance of this service and are so very grateful for the wonderful work you do.  In this episode: Lifeline's Annual Gala Ball Father's Day Low expectations, no pressure, time with family  Being a grandparent on Father's Day Reaping what you sow Unconditional love Lifeline: Help is available. Speak with someone toda

Journalist Angela Pollard writes that "[a]n age of confession and vulnerability has seen parenting rebranded as a challenging, joyless, expensive, and freedom-sapping decision. They forgot the awesome bits." On the podcast today, Angela chats with Justing about finding the joy in parenting, the importance of perspective and gratitude, and why we must speak of the great parts of parenthood—because although parenting is hard, it's absolutely worth it! In this episode: The vulnerabilities VS the joys of parenting Parenting needs a PR job? Blame the mummy bloggers | Angela Mollard | The Daily Telegraph Finding fulfilment in parenting Generational differences Gratitude Look for the 'glimmers' every day #148 Flecks of Gold Perspective  Being present What Your Child Needs From You by Dr Justin Coulson (use coupon code SPRING15 for a sneaky discount! Ends 6/5/24) Related links: Parenting Made Easy(er) Unplugging Parenthood (and being present!) Doors are now open to the Happy Families Membership  NEW weekly kids

It's National Child Protection Week. Today's conversation is with author, publisher, mother, and educator Janeen Sanders, a strong public advocate for children’s safety, education, and empowerment. Jayneen joins Dr Justin to speak on the importance of teaching consent and body safety to children of all ages and how parents can do this in age-appropriate ways. This is an essential skill for every parent: to keep our children safe from sexual abuse and sexual predators. In this episode: Statistics The younger a child, the more vulnerable and at-risk they are Online grooming #926 Who Tops the List of Child Sexual Abusers? Using correct anatomical names Teaching body boundary and consent Grandparents and hugging Creating a safety network for your child Jayneen Sander's resources: Body Safety Red Flags by Jayneen Sanders My Body! What I Say Goes! by Jayneen Sanders Body Safety and Consent VALUE BUNDLE by Jayneen Sanders My Body Safety Rules - FREE POSTER Head to the Educate 2 Empower website for more books, les

Robert asks, What can you do when your teenager won’t go to school? Throw in the complexity of neurodivergence, and this becomes a tough situation! Plus, a question from Sian about managing the inconsistency between a reward/token system at school and what is going on at home. Can two very different structures coexist and work for your child? In this episode: Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD) Emotion-Based School Avoidance Pathological Demand Avoidance (PDA) or Persistent Desire for Autonomy Conflict around gaming Connection vs control Explore, explain, empower Emotional valence (the extent to which an emotion is pleasant or unpleasant, ranging from negative to positive) Intrinsic vs extrinsic motivation Building structure in the home Related links: School Refusal Screens And Our Boys Punishment, Reward, and Other Disciplinary Mistakes #720 What are the Psychological Needs of Our Kids? Doors are now open to the Happy Families Membership  NEW weekly kids’ ‘Print & Play’ subscription FELT (Fosterin

Is cleaning your teenage son's room every day reinforcing outdated gender roles and enabling a future of entitlement? Or is it an act of love, showing care and understanding for a busy, tired teenager? No matter where you stand, Justin and Kylie delve into what truly matters in a thoughtful discussion about kids, chores, and their role in contributing to the household. In this episode: Mom tidies teen's room each morning as a kind act of service, prompting a fascinating debate | Upworthy Social media - the good, the bad, the ugly Gratitude Chores, schedules, jobs Gendered expectations? Division of labour, working together Explore, explain, empower Related links: I am Not the Maid – How to get 5 Star Service from the Kids at Home My 13-Year-Old Doesn’t Pick up a Single Thing Developmental Milestones [Introduction] Doors are now open to the Happy Families Membership  NEW weekly kids’ ‘Print & Play’ subscription FELT (Fostering Emotional Learning Together) Find us on Facebook or TikTok Subscribe to the H

Got a tech-savvy teen who dodges screen-time limits or constantly craves social media validation? Justin and Kylie share how their weekly family meetings provide time and space for ongoing conversations about screen use, leading to personal accountability and self-evaluation, with increased buy-in from the whole family!  In this episode: 'Word of the year' review Why Grandparents matter Developmental paediatricians  Family meetings Screen use Sneaky teens - getting around screen-time limits Toxic need for validation on social media Force creates resistance Motivation contiuum Phubbing Related Links: #845 Phones, Phubbing & Relationship Satisfaction Register for The Screen Smart Series - 'Unplug Childhood' and 'Tweens, Teens & Screens' #1049 Q&A – The Benefits of Plants & Grandparents Learn more about the motivation continuum in our webinar Carrots & Sticks: How Rewards and Punishments Hurt Our Kids, and What to do Instead Doors are now open to the Happy Families Membership  NEW weekly

With Father's Day just around the corner, Justin & Kylie go head to head in a battle for gold in the UFC (Ultimate Father Comedy) before stepping back in time to discover the origins of the comedy equivalent of comfort food: the "Dad Joke"!  Humour can be a quick and easy way to build connection with your kids; but don't just rely on a good dad joke to get the fun flowing! Learn what else you can do to help your kids feel seen, heard, and valued this Father's Day and beyond. In this episode: A history of dad jokes Dad jokes: intentional, predictable, cheesy, wholesome Building connection To a child, love is spelled T.I.M.E Finding opportunities to have fun The Neurological Dance of Parental Bonding: Unraveling The Oxytocin Connection | KoolkKats Related Links: Me & My Dad Activity Book [Free Download] #489 Complementary Roles of Mums and Dads With Jenet Erickson Doors are now open to the Happy Families Membership  NEW weekly kids’ ‘Print & Play’ subscription FELT (Fostering Emotional Learning

The ADHD experience is increasingly common and most people with a diagnosis (or seeking one), or who are parenting ADHD children are struggling in some way. Jane McFadden, host of the Australian podcast "ADHD Mums," shares her lived experience of receiving a shock adult ADHD diagnosis following a period of burnout, overwhelm, and mental health struggles, and the unique challenges she faces as a neurodivergent mum to neurodivergent children. In this episode: Adult ADHD diagnosis Neurodivergent parents Assessment criteria for adult ADHD Masking and camouflaging Setting up systems, scaffolding, and accommodation Mental health and comorbidities of ADHD Labels Benefits of a diagnosis Sensory issues Related Links: Help For the ADHD Parent [Article] Join the Waitlist: Parenting ADHD [The Course] Parenting an ADHD Child [Article] Doors are now open to the Happy Families Membership  NEW weekly kids’ ‘Print & Play’ subscription FELT (Fostering Emotional Learning Together) Find us on Facebook or TikTok Subscribe

You know the feeling - it's the middle of the night and a small human wakes you from your slumber and takes up residence in your bed. Caroline wants to know if it's normal for a nine year old to continue wanting to sleep in her bed, and what (if anything), she should do about it. Kate has discovered that her five year old has a tendency for being light fingered and stealing things from her purse. Should she be worried about the stealing and sneaky behaviour?  In this episode: Anxiety at night Co-sleeping Evolving ideas around childhood Building connection, wellbeing, belonging Emotional regulation Sleep matters! Thumb-sucking Low impulse control and executive function Theory of mind What to do if your child is stealing Explore, explain, empower Teaching values Related Links: Developmental Milestones [Part 4: Middle Childhood] My Kids Don't Eat Or Sleep #846 An Honest Conversation Doors are now open to the Happy Families Membership  NEW weekly kids’ ‘Print & Play’ subscription FELT (Fostering Emotional

Evidence suggests that META and other big tech companies are purposefully hurting kids through their lack of content moderation and their choice of harmful persuasive design features. Justin and Kylie discuss how you can protect your children from online exploitation and manipulation by giving them a play-based childhood. Join the village, sign the pledge to delay smartphones and social media, and “Unplug Childhood” with us! In this episode: The Surgeon General Has New Social Media Guidelines. Minnesota Already Made Some of Them Into Law | After Babel Substack | Ravi Dyer META whistleblower reports Social media algorithms Prioritising engagement over content quality Kids exposed to unwanted contact, sexual advances REPORT on addictive design of online services and consumer protection in the EU single market | European Parliament What is persuasive design? Unplug Childhood - sign the pledge Related Links: #1002 Kylie Can’t Get Enough Snapchat #1060 – No Hang-Ups With School Phone Bans (Heads Up Alliance int

Family life is a constant challenge of working out where your priorities are at any moment: Justin and Kylie must choose between a quick weekend getaway and tackling their to-do list! Plus, the flow-on effect of reducing screen time usage, removing the family TV and cancelling Netflix has been revolutionary - but how did the Coulsons get all the kids on board? In this episode: A weekend of chores and to-do lists! Creating margin Being present Super Saturday Family meetings Accountability and intentionality Screens Related Links: The Screens Issue #1045 – The Art & Science of Family Meetings Doors are now open to the Happy Families Membership  NEW weekly kids’ ‘Print & Play’ subscription FELT (Fostering Emotional Learning Together) Find us on Facebook or TikTok Subscribe to the Happy Families newsletterSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.